Provider Feature // Jaime Rowe of Impact to Income
How To Not “Should” On Yourself Endlessly
Have you ever said, “I should do…..” and spiraled into a negative bath of “shoulds”? Have you lost sight of what you “want”? If you answered yes, then you are not alone.
The most common “shoulds” I hear in sales are:
I should followup with that prospect. I should be better at sales. I should close more business. I should be able to talk about money without feeling shame. I should only work with clients that align to me. I should be more authentic with my sales process. I should have a sales process that is easier. I should be excited to do a sales call. I should be assertive. I should know how to persuade people. I should reach out to people on LinkedIn, Facebook, or Instagram. I should create a sales process. I should work on my discovery call questions.
When you look at all of these “shoulds”, it comes down to that YOU should be better (sigh). The energy is that you aren’t worthy or you are NOT good enough. The “should” mean girl crew are here to throw it in your face and it doesn’t make us feel good at all!
What if you stopped “shoulding” on yourself? What if you reconnected to those feelings in you with the true desire of “want”? Outside influences have conditioned us to focus on “shoulding” on yourself and if you don’t then you are lazy or unenthusiastic. It’s not a pretty picture. When you constantly “should” on yourself, then you are reinforcing the belief that “you aren’t good enough” which is not helping you move forward. You’re not good enough belief translates into that you can’t trust yourself or you are not to be trusted.
When we “should” on ourselves over and over, then we lose sight of what we “want”. Try one of those statements up above with “want” instead of “should”. It changes the entire feeling of the statement. In fact, you might find that the task is NOT something you want to do at all! Your priorities start to change and you start trusting yourself and your intuition.
When we are out of touch with what we “want” then we are out of touch with ourselves and our true desires. Here are some quick ideas on how to start the process of moving from “should” to “want”.
Every time you say, “I should do……”. Slow down and ask, “But do I WANT to do this?” Pause and let the answer come to you. You might find that the majority of things you feel like you “should” do are statements that don’t align with your true desires and we can move forward with those intentions in mind. Choose one day per week that is a no “shoulding” time. Everything you hear the word “should”, you would flip it to “want”. You might find that you don’t really want to do that task anyway and it doesn’t align with your true desires. I’ve seen many people have fantastic “ah ha” moments when they complete this exercise.
Slowing down to become mindful of what is going up upstairs in your brain and your relationship with “should” and “want” will connect you to your true self. It will open doors to where you would spend your time and effort with your sales process and in other areas of your life. Let’s take a break from the “should” reign of terror and say yes to how we “want” to live in this world at least once per week and get the know your true self!
Jaime Rowe is your non-conforming sales strategist teaching women in business how to do sales the feminine way. She loves working with creative thinkers who need a system and structure to make sales feel seamless. Her favorite part of business is showing women that when they stop selling themselves short and put themselves first, results happen.
Because confidence stems from inspiration and you’re the best inspiration there is. Whether she’s teaching or speaking, Jaime’s number one motivation is to empower more women to lead with impact and unlock their feminine sales success. She offers year-long supportive sales group programs, 1:1 coaching, and an encouraging community at Impact To Income. LEARN MORE.
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Get in touch with Jaime Rowe //
Website: https://impacttoincomeprogram.com/